FLASHBACK! john's running commentary of a 'real world/road rules challenge: the duel 2' episode

here's the episode link, incase john's telling below makes you jones to see it.

MTV RW/RR Challenge: The Duel 2, Episode 1 'Damned If You Duel video

-----Original Message-----

From: John M. Curiel
Sent: Thursday, April 09, 2009 4:00 PM

To: Salgado, Jose

Subject: Re: the duel

So I decided to commen as I saw the

Episode.......I just reread it...... Let's just say I was drunk and in

a hillbilly costume tired from chasing a guy in my driveway

PS I need to see this TRUE LIFE I'm on a love Triangle

Ok, Brad is engaged......BOOH!

Second, how old is Mark?! I loved when they showed the clip from the

first RR when they played clips on cassettes....still hot though

Love that both Davis and CT are together again....can't wait for CT to

get drunk and go after Davis....Didn't Davis cry last time? LOL... I

mean it must have been crazy but it was funny...even with all that,I

still think CT is Hot

And most of the girls maybe minus Anessa and Ruthie look like dumb

blonde bitches!

Oh and the other gay guy, ANNOying

Paula is such a annoying bitch too! I do agree there are some hot

boys aka Landon and Brad, just saw Davis w/o his shirt, muscles but

chub as well (I know how that feels minus the muscles of course)

WTFWTF Davis and the other gay guy..( I know his name is Ryan but I

refuse to call him that ). BTW my new favorite thing is to call Ben's

Asst. And his executive "whatshisname and the other one". Anyway, wTF

two dudes making out in the hot tub! My favorite is the chick that

just stays in there laughing. Aka me. All in all though, the most

"real" thing I've seen.

CT and Diem reunion! She looks uglier eventhough now she has her real

hair instead of thy nasty wig....didn't she cry in the other show b/c

she had to do a challenge withou it?

Love the clip of CT and Diem drunk...and she said hes had a hard hard

time aka DUI I'm sure

Wow took Shauvan 4 seconds to get fucked........looks like special ed

incest

They keep playing the Chester French song, LOVES IT!

Mmmmm if Mark were covered in ugly tattoos and I was sleeping with his

ex

He could be evan

Diem us concerned about looking stupid b/c CT fucked Shauvan?! And

when it gets confirmed her reaction??? Yes I agree Reeeeee dick u

lous!!!

And CT punches someone.... it was totally predictable.....wow 5 guys

can't stop CT , glad Anessa shows up and tries to yell him into

submission

Oh I just got to the chase Scene in the courtyard........ My favorite

is how ppl are still wearing their costumes.....also if "I were there"

I'd totally think it would be funny to blame this on the birthday

girl..."you know this is YOUR fault if we didn't celebrate you

birthday this way this wouldn't have happened" makes as much sense as

filling the house up with booze and CT and Diem

It's my fault said Diem.....LOL

CT has a nice hairy chest....YUM!

LOL Ct yelling at Diem..... What's this "career" he keeps

mentioning....more MTV competition shows?!?!

I like how Shavaun's story changed from I will neither confirm nor

deny to I wouldn't ever do that FUCKING SLUt

They brought MJ back.....hi dad

And who is this miscellaneous black girl in the bakground?

Mmmmm are you dying to see this beyonce movie?

Is diem trying to be a reporter or something ? Zzzzzxzz

MJ has such obnoxious hair.

I like how the fat guy literally crushed the other dude during the

rugby tackle

Ryan was smart to pick Nick cause he a not as strong as the other dudes

Shauvan is so STUPID I hope Anessa knocks her out..... I can't stand

her, her pink lipstick or her fatness

Landon needs to get rid of that mowhawk

And it ends now?!?! Ok the clips of the season were good aka Davis

pushing some bitch down.....I'm sure it was Brooke ooooo love the

brad and fiancée fight..."my heart is broken...LOL ".

Sent from my iPhone

On Apr 9, 2009, at 9:31 AM, "Salgado, Jose" wrote:

> i hope you tivo-ed it aka you need to watch CT chase Adam around the

> parking lot and girls holding diem back all while she is screaming.

> 

> so. RIDICULOUS!

dear abby, my parents expected me to die!

From: teeny-wahine@hotmail.com
To: miranda; alejandro.benavides; jcuriel; jsalgado; msbeebe83
Subject: this is the best dear abby!
Date: Thu, 4 Feb 2010 14:37:04 -0800

Cash-Strapped Parents Regret Deathbed Promise Made To Son


By Abigail Van Buren – Fri Jan 29, 2:16 am ET

DEAR ABBY: My 31-year-old son, "Joey," who needs a heart transplant, almost died a few weeks ago. The doctors told us he wouldn't make it through the weekend. I was beside myself. On what we thought was his deathbed, I told Joey I would give him anything he wanted if he pulled through. He wanted a very expensive sports car.
Well, my son pulled through, but has other physical challenges. My husband and I are sending him $500 a month until he starts receiving money from Social Security. It's the best we can do right now. The problem is, Joey keeps hounding me about the sports car. I cannot afford this gift. We have offered to have his current vehicle reconditioned or give him my year-old car with its very low mileage.
I do not want this to become an issue with my son. I have told him his heart condition is the priority and to let everything else fall into place. It's eating me alive that I can't give my son what I promised. On the other hand, his request is unreasonable. Please help. -- JOEY'S MOM IN LAS CRUCES

DEAR MOM: Unless you put a stop to it now, this WILL become an issue with your son. Surely he is in touch enough with reality that he knows your financial situation -- and if he doesn't, please inform him. While you're at it, explain that when you thought he was on his deathbed, you were out of your mind with grief -- and you can't be held to a promise made under such duress. At $500 a month, you can hardly be accused of being a withholding parent, so stop beating yourself up.


---------------------------------
Date: Thu, 4 Feb 2010 14:48:06 -0800
Subject: Re: this is the best dear abby!
From: alejandro.benavides
To: teeny-wahine@hotmail.com
CC: miranda; jcuriel; jsalgado; msbeebe83

I would have gave the boy a get well card with a basketball on it and said "Sports car?!?! I said sports CARD!!!"

what's this got to do with the price of rice in china?

Subject: FW: Mom 
Date: Fri, 23 Oct 2009 11:36:25 -0700 
From: miranda 
To: teeny-wahine@hotmail.com 

Can you please read this e-mail exchange from Mom? Bottom to top, please. And, I need you to tell me if she is on drugs or something. 

-----Original Message----- 
From: Holliday.Janis 
Sent: Friday, October 23, 2009 11:31 AM 
To: Miranda Holliday 
Subject: RE: Mom 

Good to know 

-----Original Message----- 
From: Miranda Holliday 
Sent: Thursday, October 22, 2009 5:15 PM 
To: Holliday.Janis 
Subject: RE: Mom 

WHAT?!

Do I like rice? Is that what you mean? Yes, I like rice 

-----Original Message----- 
From: Holliday.Janis 
Sent: Thursday, October 22, 2009 5:14 PM 
To: Miranda Holliday 
Subject: RE: Mom 

You rike lice? 

mandy's take on 'ghoulies'

-----Original Message----- 
From: Alejandro Benavides 
Sent: Wednesday, February 10, 2010 10:06 AM 
To: Miranda Holliday; meg holliday; jose -home; john -home 
Subject: Cat's eye 

this used to be frightening to my sister as a kid, but I found it hilarious!!!

Stephen King's Cat's Eye - General vs Troll video 
------------------------------------
Subject: RE: Cat's eye
Date: Wed, 10 Feb 2010 10:22:58 -0800
From: miranda
To: alejandro.benavides; teeny-wahine@hotmail.com; jxoxsxe; johnmcuriel

This movie FREAKED me out when I was little, but in later years, yes it is MEGA hilarious.

And, there is a lot of kitty stuff in this movie, Jose. Seriously important viewing
------------------------------------
From: meg holliday
Sent: Wednesday, February 10, 2010 10:27 AM
To: Miranda Holliday; alex b.; jose -home; john -home
Subject: RE: Cat's eye

mandy and i used to be soooo scared of this video cover that when we would go to the video store, my mom would have to walk in ahead of us and turn it around. 

------------------------------------
Subject: RE: Cat's eye
Date: Wed, 10 Feb 2010 10:28:13 -0800
From: miranda
To:

Then I went to my favorite video store when it was closing a few years ago and they were selling all their stock and one of them was “Ghoulies”! WHICH, I had never seen. So, I bought it and watched it and here are my notes

a. it’s not really scary

b. there’s a really funny 80’s party scene and one guy’s pick-up line is “my name is dick, but you can call me (stops to open a beer) Dick.”

c. There are two funny supernatural midgets in medieval costumes

d. The ghoulies never wear clothes and I was waiting for it the WHOLE movie

The end. 
------------------------------------
From: meg holliday
Sent: Wednesday, February 10, 2010 10:33 AM
To: Miranda Holliday; alex b.; jose -home; john -home
Subject: RE: Cat's eye

that's why it wasn't scary, 'cause they weren't wearing clothes! the horrifying part of that video cover is the suspenders.
------------------------------------
Subject: RE: Cat's eye
Date: Wed, 10 Feb 2010 10:36:37 -0800
From: miranda
To:

Riiiight! When the ghoulies were first manifested via a satanic ritual, they show up naked or whatever you call ghoulie without clothes, so I thought it might get more interesting when they show how they get/make their little outfits. But, not one of the ghoulies ever thought about getting that little suspender get-up together.

There is a scary part with a clown doll. But, I could sit in a room with a clown doll and freak out. So, that isn’t a big surprise.

There’s a part in the funny party scene where a guy in a member’s only jacket “breakdances” and then knocks himself out when he tries to spin on the floor or do a back-flip or something.

And, there’s a Ghoulies Part III where they go to college. I think maybe they figured they would need an advanced degree in order to buy some specially made clothes. 

'precious'... the movie review for the masses

-----Original Message----- 
From: Miranda Holliday
Sent: Friday, November 13, 2009 10:41 AM 
To: Salgado, Jose; john -home 
Subject: precious 

Did you go see it and how was it?


On Nov 13, 2009, at 10:46 AM, "Salgado, Jose" <JSalgado@mednet.ucla.edu> wrote:

amazing. john is better with words so i'll let him tell you more. 


-----Original Message-----
From: John M. Curiel
Sent: Friday, November 13, 2009 12:58 PM
To: Salgado, Jose
Cc: Miranda Holliday
Subject: Re: precious

OMG, yes it was amazing....

Piece of advice though: when you and Emerson go see it make sure to buy popcorn and m&ms. That way you could feed each other popcorn during the entire movie. Then at some point, Emerson can shake his head "no" but u should continue to feed him more, after that ask him your scratch your back, remember to lean forward so he can scratch all over, finally, toss m&ms at Emerson, both he and the person he's sitting next to will love it

What was I talking about?

Anyway Precious.... I knew it was going to be "heartbreaking" but I wish someone had warned me that it was set in the late 80s..... I wasn't prepared for the ghetto blaster boomboxes or 80s gameshow clips. Although it's of interest to note that obese girls in the 80s dress like obese girls in the present

The rest of the movie goes around like his:

lady arm Pit hair, learning to read by spellin the word "slut", Vaseline as lube, imagining yourself as a skinny white girl is one way of gettin through the day; fairy tales don't begin with "on Sunday I went to church in Brooklyn", gold teeth, pigs feet should be eaten w/ collard greens and macaroni w/ cheese but shouldn't be hairy, physical abuse includes forcing people to eat hairy pigs feet W/o collard greens (FYI Jose's mom served me and her grandchildren pigs feet last Sunday), you know you don't have HIV if you've never "Don' it all up in da azz", down syndrome children are kinda cute and having one gaurantees money every month, and finally young lady Jamaican accents are pretty damn funny

Sent from my iPhone 

sexy lady man claus with matching boots

-----Original Message----- 
From: John Curiel 
Sent: Friday, December 12, 2008 10:41 AM 
To: Salgado, Jose 
Subject: For no good reason 

 

________________________________________
From: Salgado, Jose
Sent: Friday, December 12, 2008 10:44 AM
To: John Curiel
Cc: Miranda (E-mail); Meg (E-mail); Steph (E-mail)
Subject: RE: For no good reason

there is a reason... because i radiate faboulosity! 

________________________________________
From: John Curiel
Sent: Friday, December 12, 2008 10:46 AM
To: Salgado, Jose
Cc: Miranda Holliday; Meg (E-mail); Steph (E-mail)
Subject: RE: For no good reason

I need to be inoculated against your fabulosity! 

________________________________________
From: Miranda Holliday
Sent: Friday, December 12, 2008 10:48 AM
To: John Curiel; Salgado, Jose
Cc: Meg (E-mail); Steph (E-mail)
Subject: RE: For no good reason

What is going on on that computer screen! Is that a fat man/woman (?) dressed like a slutty mrs. Claus?

I must know.

Enhance….enhance…..enhance… 

________________________________________
From: John Curiel
Sent: Friday, December 12, 2008 10:52 AM
To: Miranda Holliday; Salgado, Jose
Cc: Meg (E-mail); Steph (E-mail)
Subject: RE: For no good reason

Funny thing about the picture is that it's me gettin close to my two favorite slutty Ms. Claus female impersonators...from what I remember of that night, they had heavy latino accents one was names, "Sasha" and kept inviting me back to her apt on Rrrrrrrroberrrtson. 

________________________________________
From: Salgado, Jose
Sent: Friday, December 12, 2008 10:54 AM
To: John Curiel; Miranda Holliday
Cc: Meg (E-mail); Steph (E-mail)
Subject: RE: For no good reason

________________________________________
From: Miranda Holliday
Sent: Friday, December 12, 2008 10:55 AM
To: Salgado, Jose; John Curiel
Cc: Meg (E-mail); Steph (E-mail)
Subject: RE: For no good reason

She’s crying tears of glitter!!!! 

________________________________________
From: Salgado, Jose
Sent: Friday, December 12, 2008 10:55 AM
To: John Curiel; Miranda Holliday
Cc: Meg (E-mail); Steph (E-mail)
Subject: RE: For no good reason

I found John's holiday wallpaper:

 

________________________________________
From: Miranda Holliday
Sent: Friday, December 12, 2008 10:55 AM
To: Salgado, Jose; John Curiel
Cc: Meg (E-mail); Steph (E-mail)
Subject: RE: For no good reason

Is the mrs. Claus in the background serenading you with some holiday carols

“uhhhh, I like it like that, she’s working that back and I don’t how to act! Slow motion for me….” 

________________________________________
From: Miranda Holliday
Sent: Friday, December 12, 2008 10:55 AM
To: John Curiel; Salgado, Jose
Cc: Meg (E-mail); Steph (E-mail)
Subject: RE: For no good reason

I like that you know enough slutty ms. Claus female impersonators in order to have not one, but TWO, favorites!

It sounds like you met Sasha Fierce

________________________________________
From: John Curiel
Sent: Friday, December 12, 2008 10:58 AM
To: Miranda Holliday; Salgado, Jose
Cc: Meg (E-mail); Steph (E-mail)
Subject: RE: For no good reason

La Sasha Feroz actually 

quitting whoring... easy as pie?

________________________________________
From: Miranda Holliday
Sent: Thursday, December 04, 2008 2:08 PM
To: John Curiel; Salgado, Jose; Meg (E-mail)
Subject: RE: Stop what you're doing, click on the link and then click speak to me

There’s a Christian cooking show! I don’t know, John. The bible belt is pretty fat, I’m sure “Breaking Bread” is going to have some kick ass recipes…that will offer salvation.

Do you think they have a recipe that will stop me from being a whoring tramp?
________________________________________
From: John Curiel
Sent: Thursday, December 04, 2008 2:12 PM
To: Miranda Holliday; Salgado, Jose; Meg (E-mail)
Subject: RE: Stop what you're doing, click on the link and then click speak to me

Honey, you stop being a whoring tramp by keeping things OUT of your mouth, not putting them in!
_____________________________________
From: Miranda Holliday
Sent: Thursday, December 04, 2008 2:18 PM
To: John Curiel; Salgado, Jose; Meg (E-mail)
Subject: RE: Stop what you're doing, click on the link and then click speak to me

I’ll never learn.
________________________________________
From: John Curiel
Sent: Thursday, December 04, 2008 2:19 PM
To: Miranda Holliday; Salgado, Jose; Meg (E-mail)
Subject: RE: Stop what you're doing, click on the link and then click speak to me

It's okay baby . . . now go on and wash under your hood like Amy Sedaris showed you.....

Chelsea Lately with Amy Sedaris video
________________________________________
From: Miranda Holliday
Sent: Thursday, December 04, 2008 2:23 PM
To: John Curiel; Salgado, Jose; Meg (E-mail)
Subject: RE: Stop what you're doing, click on the link and then click speak to me

I’m scrubbing away under my desk with a bottle of sparkletts, some hand sanitizer, and balled up post-its. That should do the trick!
_____________________________________

From: John Curiel
Sent: Thursday, December 04, 2008 2:25 PM
To: Miranda Holliday; Salgado, Jose; Meg (E-mail)
Subject: RE: Stop what you're doing, click on the link and then click speak to me

That's one of my favorite things about you, RESOURCEFUL!

peacehole?

From: happy holliday 
Subject: peace? 
To: "nate" 
Date: Wednesday, August 6, 2008, 9:02 AM 

remember when i was on the phone with you monday and i saw a disturbing drawing sitting atop the trashcan at work? well, below is the pic. i don't get it! it looks like some crazy cross-eyed person is bending over and getting "peace" up the ass! i call this piece of art... WHAT WHAT IN THE BUTT?!! 

jose's prolapsed anusaurus... mandy's transportion

________________________________________ 
From: Miranda Holliday 
Sent: Tuesday, April 15, 2008 12:51 PM 
To: Salgado, Jose 
Subject: so what's the deal! 

How in tarnation am I going to get to the Westside? I am way too refined for the bus!
________________________________________
From: Salgado, Jose
Sent: Tuesday, April 15, 2008 1:02 PM
To: Miranda Holliday
Cc: Megan (E-mail)
Subject: RE: so what's the deal!

Ok don't take the bus... take whatever i just drew below!

 

 ____________________________________
From: Miranda Holliday
Sent: Tuesday, April 15, 2008 1:13 PM
To: Salgado, Jose
Cc: Megan Barnes
Subject: RE: so what's the deal!

Is that a winged dinosaur with a prolapsed anus?
I’m sad that my hair is thinning so rapidly. But, at least the weather looks nice on Friday. Did you consult the extended forecast? I like accuracy in my artwork